I learnt today that if someone told you that they couldn’t help falling in love with you, you had to be very careful. My class was aghast at what the speaker said…but hold your horses. Apparently, her priest said that feelings come and go and what really keeps a couple together is alot more than feelings and lust. Hmmm….how many marriages last these days? Are we getting married for the wrong reasons? Some get married because of economic reasons, lust, infatuation, some Singaporeans for baby bonuses and tax rebate (!!), or simply because the time was right…
Looking back, how many times have you fallen in love or thought you were in love? Some describe love as a heady rush of emotions, hearts racing, palms sweating, at a loss of words when that special person was around and a sense of emptiness when that person left. Some claim that love is irrational. To a certain extent, I agree but I think love is really what is left over, when all the passion fades, the feelings vented, and you cannot imagine life without the person because your lives are so entwined that one would be at a loss when that person left…would you love “for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and health, until death do us part?” How many married couples keep to their vows these days?
But what if the person left you? Do you cry at the unfairness of it, blame the situation/illness/third party? Or does one blame themselves for not spotting the signs earlier on? It is the toughest when the one you love leaves you suddenly, without any warning or sign. The ability to accept, forgive, forget, detach and let go of the one you love is probably the hardest thing to do especially when that person is all you ever wanted, the person U wanted to spend the rest of your life with. One never recovers fully from such a situation…because if that person is still alive and you bump into them one day, unwittingly, all Scars resurface and one gets all breath knocked out of their body…
But life goes on and eventually, you have to let go of the one you love be it to death, sickness or to another party.
So what’s your definition of love? 
hey babe,
i’ve just typed out a long comment. but it got ‘lost’ when i tried to submit. =( lemme try to recap..
havent been reading your blog for a looong time till i stumbled by this evening. i must say that i really enjoyed reading ur posts on love, life and leadership! most of what you say resonates in me and im really impressed at your style of writing; summing complexities and observations so seamlessly with such simple and elegant language. the topics that u write about brings out the warmth and fuzziness in me, yet not too ‘girly’. keep this blog going, yeah?
with regards to the topic, i’d say, i’ve fallen in love twice in my life, but i still do not have a “definition for love”. what a paradox to be able to “diagnose” and identify the presence of “love” yet not being able to define it… totally unacceptable way of “diagnosis” in my line of work (and urs too :p).
anyhow, i stand by my ‘mantra’ that – love is not to be defined, seen, heard, or thought, but to be felt by the heart… we still love that special someone regardless of all the hurtful words and puzzling actions we dish out to him/her.. you think?
as for marriage, i certainly hope i can marry The One that i feel so right about. and not marry just becos the time is right or for loyalty or for any other reasons other than love
Shakespeare said it best:
“…Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or Bends with the remover to remove.
O, no! It is an ever-fixed mark,
That looks on tempests and is never shaken.
It is the star to every wandering bark,
whose worth’s unknown, although his height be taken.”
– William Shakespeare